Laundry is my nemesis. It never ends. Every single week there it is, piles and piles of clothes that need to be washed AGAIN! As soon as the dirty clothes hamper is emptied, it is filled with more clothes that need to be washed, dried, folded and put away. Especially as a mom, I am amazed at the amount of laundry that piles up. Sometimes I will just stare at it wishing I could make it disappear like Jeannie from the TV show “I Dream of Genie”. I could just fold my arms over, blink and BOOM, the clothes would be folded and neatly placed in their respective dressers. But, alas, the magic of television does nothing to help me with the laundry. I have to take on those piles of jeans, t-shirts and towels myself. They aren’t going to disappear, there is no easy way. I have to painstakingly sift through each article, clear the pockets of rocks, candy wrappers, loose change and lip balms, turn them right side out, fold them, and make sure my husband doesn’t end up with our daughter’s pair of jeans in his drawer.
Much like the loads of laundry that loom, we are all hit with an unexpected crises from time to time . We cannot ignore it, we can’t blink our eyes and make it go away, it is our crisis, our hardship to face, and we have to begin to pick through and find a way to sort it out. As much as we wish we could delegate it out to someone else, it’s ours to deal with. There’s an interesting thing that happens when you go through a crisis. It changes you, and seems to divide your life into two halves: before and after. Without even realizing it, there are things about you, and your relationships that will never be the same. Some changes are good, some aren’t, but the changes are inevitable. One thing is for certain, nothing will be as it was. I remember during a huge crisis in my marriage, my husband and I started seeing a counselor. I just kept saying “It will never be the same, it will never be the same.” His reply surprised me “But you don’t want it to be the same. The relationship you had before had some serious flaws. You don’t want it to be the same, you want it to be better.” He was overwhelmingly right. A crisis produces in us a desire to do whatever we can to overcome it. We go into survival mode, and if our desire is to come through it alive and together, we will do anything in our power to fight our way through it.
I remember when our journey through healing began, I felt as if I was standing in front of our daunting crisis wondering how on earth we would get through. It seemed insurmountable. Although it wasn’t impossible (because with God ALL things are possible), it was by far the most difficult journey of both of our lives. There were intricacies of this crisis that we didn’t even anticipate. Feeling we didn’t expect, brokenness that felt it could never be repaired, and yet forgiveness that took us both by surprise. Our God is BIGGER!
I’m so thankful that my husband and I have had the opportunity to reach out to other couples in crisis. By using our testimony of failure and restoration, we have been able to encourage others that, though the fight is excruciatingly painful, it is so worth it in the end. My heart breaks every time I hear of a couple who is just beginning the same journey my husband and I took. They have no idea how long and how hard the journey will be. There are more bad days than good days at first, and it’s often one step forward, two steps back. There are days when you like each other, and days when you don’t. Moments when you think you will make it, and other moments when you literally feel as if you will die simply from a broken heart. Don’t ever forget that moving forward is moving forward. It doesn’t matter how slow you are going, just make sure to keep moving forward in obedience to God. When your heart is hidden in God, you don’t lose. Much like sorting through the dirty laundry, God is walking beside you and will protect you as you process through this amazing road of healing He has waiting for you!